Can You See Me?
by Swayzee Sweetheart
Summary: For The Angst Challenge: First Angst. Kendall's dad passes away and Kendall takes it hard.


The steady beeping sound of the heart monitor grew slower and slower. Fainter and fainter. But the tears in Kendall's eyes were coming like floods. Kendall's father laid motionlessly in the hospital bed wearing that sickly colored blue hospital gown. Kendall sniffled for the millionth time in the past couple of hours. His father stirred in his sleep.

"Kenny?" Kendall's father called out. Kendall was instantly at his dad's side, tears and all. His father smiled at his son's eagerness to please even at that moment. The moment where the doctors don't know if he will live or die due to the appreciable amount of blood lost.

"Yes, Daddy." Kendall asked his father who smiled at him. Kendall never out grew the term 'Daddy' like most boys do. They shed what they call the 'Baby Stigma' and shortened Daddy to Dad. Kendall wasn't that kid. Kendall love calling his father Daddy because it made him feel closer to his dad.

"Where's that James Diamond at?" Kendall's dad asked. Kendall blushed at his father's words not knowing where this conversation was going. Kendall's parents didn't know- or should I say, Kendall didn't think his parent knew he was gay and had the biggest most ginormous crush on James.

"He want and got me a soda from the vending machine. He's been here s-since t-the a-a-accident." Kendall stuttered out as the lump in his throat got bigger. He tried swallowing but the lump was just bobbing, signaling it wasn't going anywhere anytime soon.

Kendall's father, John, grabbed his son and kissed his forehead, something he always did when Kendall was feeling sad or low and needed a parent to just embraces him. "Son, I know that your gay." John said as Kendall tried to pull away but John held him tighter. "No. I am not mad at you. Like I told you when you were a kid, It doesn't matter who you love. You can't help that. As long as your happy, I'm happy. And I know you and James have some very strong feelings for each other. Almost as strong as your mother and I. Maybe stronger and me and you Mom have been married for 20 years. What I'm saying is this isn't your fault." John said to his son. Kendall tried to make the tears not flow but they did anyways.

"It's all my fault! If I had been looking where I was going, I would've seen the stupid car and-" John spoke up and cut Kendall off, knowing his son could very well end up in that same hospital due to overactive nerves and hyperventilating.

"Kendall Knight, this is most defiantly not your fault. I am your father(1). It is my job to protect you and it was my job to save your life. Kendall, I want you to be happy. Take care of your mother and aunt for me." John said and Kendall just stood there nodding. "Give e a hug." John said. Kendall bent down and hugged john as he whispered into his ear. "_I love you so much. I'll be watching over you from up there. Take care of them, Kenny. I . . . . . . . . I love you, son."_John whisper as the monitor went dead.

"NOOOOOOOOOO! Dad come back. Wake up please! Please wake up."Kendall cried as the doctors and nurses ran in. Kendall was escorted out and into James' arms. Little did he know James heard the entire conversation.

"H-h-he's gone, J-James."Kendall cried into James' chest. James held onto Kendall tightly.

The next week was the funeral. Kendall looked into his mirror as he fixed his tie. He knew that his parents had to die but he never in a million years thought when he was so young. Tears ran down Kendall's face as he looked in the mirror to only see his father's face. He heard his door open and in walked James and Carlos and Logan. He turned and smiled at them.

"Hey, buddy. It's okay. We all miss him." Logan said. That helped but it wasn't the same.

"That's nice but it doesn't really help. He was my dad. My best friend. I told him everything and he told me everything. But now he's gone forever and he's not coming back. I-" Kendall was cut off by his own sobs. James hugged him and let him crumple to the floor. For a week, Kendall's had this facade going like he wasn't sad. He went on with his life for a week. Everyone had been waiting for him to have a break down.

"Kendall, shh. You still have us." Logan said. Kendall just cried harder and harder.

"You all remind me of my daddy. You all have characteristics of him. John Knight was **the **best daddy anyone could ask for. I never thought I'd lose him like this.' Kendall said softly. His friends just let him cry because there'd be a lot of it.

"My daddy was the best in the- the world." Kendall said as he got chocked up on his sobs. They were in the middle of the funeral. It was beautiful in it's own right. Beside the fact that it was hero. a funeral, it was nice. "Um, My dad was-is my hero. He was always there for me. He saved my life. B-but I miss him s-so much. I love you daddy. Can you see me?" Kendall whispered as he walked off the pulpit and to his mom and aunt. The preacher said his words and they picked up the casket and walked it out the church and into the hearse while Kendall and his family walked behind.

"Mommy, I miss him." Kendall said to Jennifer. She smiled sadly at him and pulled him into a hug.

"I know baby. I do too." Jennifer said. Kendall looked up to see James. "Can I talk to you?" He asked. Kendall nodded. The two of the two of them went to sit under the awning. James took a deep breath.

U

"Kendall, I heard you and your father's conversation before he um, passed away and I just want you to know that I'm always here for you, no matter what." James said. Kendall sniffled and laid his head on his best friend's shoulder. "_Yes, I can see you_." Kendall heard in his ear. Kendall whipped around so fast to see who that was. He turned and looked at the meadow in his back yard and saw a ghostly image of his father's tall figure. John's spirit waved at Kendall and Kendall waved back. John turned around and walked into the sunlight slowly disappearing. Kendall felt a smile form at his lips as tears slowly fell from his eyes. He'd never forget that moment. He smiled and rested his head on James' shoulder. He may not have his dad anymore but he did have his family- his Mommy and his Antie Cas- His friends- Carlos and Logan- and his James and that would have to do. The smile graced Kendall's features as he watched the spot. James looked down at Kendall and squeezed him. The shaking in Kendall's shoulders was less visible but he still felt it. Slowly, but surly, Kendall wouldn't hurt as bad.

_Yes, I can see you_


End file.
